The Sanity

If there’s no pain then nor will happiness,
This is the law of balance that no one can escape,
As we don’t have the power to rewind like a tape,
Despite that people still ignore their fate,
And drown themselves in their lost reality.

That was something I carved in my deep blue pool,
And now I’m revisiting that place again,
How long has it been under the rain?
3 years? That child must have been in pain.

Along the way I saw a few familiar faces,
How could I forget their brown hazel eyes?
Their eyes are still screaming curses as I walked by,
Those impostors…how long do they want to cry?
It seems that their scars are not completely stitched,
Not surprised at all with the hope & strength they ditched,
One of their forms is becoming more like a lich now,
That’s what he gets for thinking that life is dull.
I also came across another familiar cell of paranoid,
The one where black snowflakes appear from the void,
At least this one set himself free forever,
Never again be alone like the song “My December”.

And so finally I’ve reached my destination,
The place where it all started this old civilization,
There in the middle stood a child staring at the horizon,
Being motionless as if he was in another dimension.

The dragon that fought alone in his battles,
The sentimental that painted the black white poems,
The dreamer that dreamed the unattainable,
And the silencer that roamed around
looking for a place called home.

Looking at him felt like I was looking at a mirror,
I felt sorry for him & was filled with remorse,
Abandoning his innocence by force was the cause,
That was one of my greatest error of errors.

I don't really remember what happened after that,
But I guess it's safe to say we have reconnected,
 Now that he no longer lingers with conflict,
I too can leave the deficit,
And live through it. 

The Jester

On one fine morning in the class of 2B,
ebiL was sitting thinking & was quite sleepy,
He’ll only be awake if there are jokes around,
With his friend papa bear being a class clown.
But one day papa bear became tired,
So he decided to pass on his “legacy” & retired,
ebiL was an amateur he wasn’t really that funny,
All papa bear could say was “Jokes come naturally.”

It wasn’t easy being on the stage acting crack wise,
People looking at you expecting a LOL,
But it was a reverse they tease him calling him “bell bell~”.
It was really embarrassing but he took it well,
There were times when he actually breaks the ice,
But there were also times when he was trying too hard,
Time flew by & he increased his collection of joker cards,
It soon developed into a habit & it was his rise.

Being dramatic was the thing he traded for being unromantic,
Imagining him being dating someone makes people barf.
What do I mean? Well just try to be in his shoes,
Every time he says something is like a dart,
It may be a joke but it can still hurt people's heart,
“Not romantic at all.” That’s what his friends said,
“Lol word~ how could he possibly go on a date?”
That was what he really hated about his classmates,

Soon he started to see that he’s everybody’s jester,
Like a celebrity finding love isn’t so easy,
Gone like the wind people forget about him eventually,
Too busy with their lives in every semester,
Can’t really remember the last time he hang out,
Really lonely he really wanted to scream & shout,
That was when he stopped caring so much,
Such as going out, getting wasted & keeping in touch.

If you asked him whether his talent is a gift or cursed,
I don't think the answer would be "It's great!" or "It's the worst",
But oh well...with great humour comes great entertainment,
So jokers be jokin'.

The Eighth Note

Hello again boys & girls, ladies & gents, men & women,
If I could actually have some of your time & moment,
I have return from a long voyage with another story to tell,
Of how people are searching for themselves along their own rails,
And about me coming back from where I fell as well.

For years everyone has been searching who they really are,
Tattoos, body piercing, cussing & smoking like a superstar,
People get them to stand out so they can be different,
A reason of in a search of their identity self,
They abandon their childhood soul on a shelf.
Despite the fame & fortune they receive along the way,
Once in awhile they’ll feel something missing in their life,
Was it happiness or love? Well there’s no definite answer I say,
Because a berzillion people can have a berzillion different answers,
Thus they can also be a berzillion different trump cards to play.

For eight years I’ve always felt there was something missing,
At random times I would be loathing in depression over nothing,
Simply drawing random black & white pictures unconsciously,
I actually never thought that it could be made into a story,
Before I knew I have already paint out a pair of trilogies.
With new images popping out every semester,
I wonder how long I will be putting the pieces together,
I guess it won’t end so soon so it’ll probably go on forever,
Forever in my mind & soul these arts I will treasure.

At the eighth year there was the eighth note,
Like a glass I broke down like the shattered dragonfly,
It felt like the end of the world with no goodbyes,
I got slapped really hard and I only had two options,
Which is either to grow new wings or let my heart be frozen,
Little did I know that these wings were from the shelf,
Covered in dust I felt happy & disappointed at myself,
Happy that I finally found what was missing all this time,
Disappointed that I refuse to nurture it & make it shine.

This year my direction course is slowly changing,
Where am I going? I don’t know…my God is steering,
Chilling at the backseat depending on Him to do the driving,
So boys & girls, ladies & gents, men & women,
I guess this is all I have to say,
I got to go now because I have a game to play,
Thanks for reading & have a nice day.

The Dragon Fly

When I opened my eyes…there you were,
In front of me but not knowing who I am,
Because I had a mask on hiding from her,
The same one--sided smiley mask I’m sure.

Many thoughts ran through my mind,
Like what did she hear from his lines?
Or does she even know that mask is mine?
Well doesn’t really matter, everything seems fine.

But one thing that occured to me is that,
When my mask fell off I became so frighten,
I even had to hide from you under the mat,
Our distance was so distant at that moment.

Unexpectedly you still came to see me,
Despite knowing within me lies a malice,
You just stood beside me…instead of saying farewell,
Then I realized my dream has something to tell.

Where have you been all this while?
Or was I too blind to see…
That you have always been behind me?

Why didn’t I take you with me?
Was it because I was ignorant…
Trying to act tough like a tyrant?

How did it become so beautiful?
Despite being thrown aside…
The wings refused to divide.

Whenever I stretch it out widely,
I am confident & headstrong,
Whatever problem may come I will take them on.

What have I become with these wings,
Is truly a gift & blessing from the Heavens,
For it allows me to fly away from that cavern.

I guess this is what a new hope feels like.

The Longing

What is this place again..?

Oh...the black snowflakes,

It’s the time of year again,

When the air gives you…a sense of longing.

Someone once told me about that

saying birds can fly freely anywhere,

But if there was no place to rest their wings,

They might regret being born with that blessing.

A bird like that with no place to go,

Is like a person living a boring life behind a wall,

Unable to climb over or tear it down…

Is this because he doesn’t have a goal?

A boy like that living for himself,

Actually prefers the moon over the sun,

He probably doesn’t realize how colourless his life is,

But he probably felt there was something he missed.

A loner like that living alone…

under his snow covered home,

Is no different from a workaholic,

Because once in awhile he probably

wished there is somewhere to go to…

And someone to come home too.

A single person like me

is just like a snow covered tree,

Because at this time of the year,

It makes your mind all so clear,

That you need someone so dear,

For new leaves to bloom instead of tears.